Daring Monday: Try Wild & Crazy On For Size

At first I had a hard time coming up with a theme for this week’s Daring Monday. I was racking my brain while I was running errands this weekend (driving is a fabulous way to get new ideas; don’t believe me, try it!) and all my brain said was: Try something that scares you.

“That,” I said to myself, “is a very unhelpful idea. The whole point of being Daring is to do things that scare you. Not exactly a ground breaking suggestion you are having there.” My Idea Self, slightly chastised, decided to redeem itself by following along that trail.

Something that scares you… something that scares you… Ah ha! This week’s challenge was born: This week, do something that is out of character for you.

I should start this challenge with a proviso, I don’t mean that you should start acting like someone else. I am BIG on knowing, and being, who you are, and my own life has become a huge journey deeper and deeper into my own integrity. So, I’d like to be clear that I am not suggesting you act outside of your own integrity. I was actually thinking more along the lines of acting into it.

Too often we take on who others perceive us to be – who we are in the outside world, for whatever reason – as our true character. We forget that it’s not who people think we are, or how we think we are supposed to act that defines us. It’s who we are inside our heads (and hearts) that defines our true selves. (In which case, I am a multiple personality, slightly insane – I’ve always liked eccentric better – Energizer rabbit…)

There are things I can say, or do, that would shock most people in my life. I remember, one day about a year ago, I was meeting my husband for lunch. (Sometimes I go hang out in his work city for the day and we’ll have lunch together – it’s a nice mid-week treat for both of us.) On that particular day, two of his friends and work companions were having lunch with us, so instead of picking him up I was supposed to meet him at the restaurant.

Let’s just say that Wakizashi is not the best person to give me directions; I don’t know if he’s bad at directions overall or if we just think so differently… Anyway, I was late and lost. I turned into what I thought was the wrong driveway, only to find, I couldn’t get back out (the parking lot was under construction, etc… etc…) and go in the direction I wanted. So I left my car there and walked. I was just as lost on foot and by the time I got to where he was I was FUMING. I was angry, and frustrated, and overwhelmed and I made sure he knew it.

Amusingly, one of his friends was shocked to see me so emotional (or, I should say, negatively emotional). She said, and I quote, “I thought you were so calm and together. This isn’t like you at all.”

Not like me? Yes, I practice calm, positiveness, and easy going-ness, but I practice it to keep me from being a freaking wreak. Even the most together of us has their moments (and nothing like your spouse to bring one of those moments on). I realized right then and there she had no idea who I really was. Above all else, I’m a naturally fiery person – and that means lots of emotions, the good and bad kind. I know I’m not Zen, but not everyone else does.

The problem arises when you start to believe you are that external person. Or, even worse, when you’ve been putting that mask on for so long that you don’t even remember who the core you is. That’s why this week’s dare is so important. It pushes us out of that facade and into the real, dirty, world of our Selves.

This week I want you to do something you’ve been holding off on; I want you to do something that moves you closer to your integrity, but scares the people around you. I want you to take the kind of action that is immensely true to your buried soul and starving heart, but makes someone say, “Wow, that’s so out of character for you…”

It could be something big: quit your much-hated-making-you-sick job, start your new venture, end (or start) that relationship. Or it could be something little: buy red shoes, paint that painting already, put your foot down, eat the chocolate cake (you know you want it!)…

Something in us (I suspect it’s my ego) is terrified of us becoming our true selves, living in our true power; this terror holds us in check and in it’s thrall for years on end. It’s not You who is afraid, it’s the you you’ve been wearing who doesn’t want to die; it’s your character (your ego) not your Self that shakes and quivers at the idea of shiny red shoes.

This week, be a little daring and buy the shoes, be yourself, shock someone you know and love (just a little) with the real you. And hey, I found this great (albeit old) post on Danielle Laporte’s White Hot Truth that I thought was the perfect compliment (like Peanut Butter to Wonder Bread) to this week’s dare: The Ridiculous Pursuit of Being Well-Rounded. Go ahead, try wild and crazy on for size and reveal a little bit of yourself to the world. You’ll thank me for it later!